guest spot alex: ten things being pregnant has taught me.

meet sweet, alex.

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okkk, wait. i’m getting ahead of myself.

alex recently married the love of her life mike in august last year.

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adorable, right?

alex has never been shy about her desire to have kids. & like most newlyweds, they couldn’t wait to add to their growing family.

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& after a few months of trying, well, she was pregnant.

last weekend i asked alex, like i ask every pregnant person i meet, how far along she is. her response was the typical “blah blah blah weeks.” & if you’ve never been pregnant, you know exactly what i’m talking about. in my mind, time travels in MONTHS, not weeks. so when you say 16 weeks, that means four MONTHS. so just say four MONTHS! i told alex this & she went on to explain the math & reasoning behind the use of weeks vs. months blah blah blah which gave me the brilliant idea to have her guest spot on my blog. i wanna know, as i’m sure you to do too, all the things being pregnant has taught her.

enjoy & please leave lots of love for alex. she’s hilarious & beautiful & just down-right excited to be having her first child!

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1. people will ask if me “are you excited?” ummm, OF COURSE i am excited! & if i wasn’t, do you think i would really admit it?!
2. “morning sickness” does NOT just mean i get sick ONLY in the morning. there is nothing “morning” about throwing up at 9:30pm. yes, pm!
3. people on crack can have a baby, but if i eat a piece of deli meat & some brie cheese, i could get a bacteria infection & lose my baby . . .  says my doctor.
4. it’s much easier for me to lose weight when i’m pregnant than when i’m not pregnant. week 16, down 13 pounds. thanks “morning” sickness!
5. when people ask me, “isn’t pregnancy the greatest thing ever?! i loved being pregnant!” i’m suddenly convinced they are one of those people on crack.
6. everyone, i mean everyone, is a pregnancy expert & feels the need to give me all the advice i never wanted & never asked for. for example:”you should have a natural birth; you will appreciate your mother so much more.” ummm, my mom had every drug available & was high as a kite when i was born. & i intend to be the same way, you know, so i can appreciate her more.

7. the concept of personal space & privacy goes right out the window. for example: people, who have NEVER touched me before, will try & touch my stomach, even though i’m not even showing yet. this goes for complete strangers too. if you didn’t put it here, don’t touch it.

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also! people ask me if i’m planning on breast feeding my child. yeah, if we can leave my boobs out of our conversation & your thoughts, i would really appreciate it.
& finally, women will tell me all about their own deliveries. thank you random woman in the grocery store for telling me about your 4th degree tearing. if you’ll excuse me, i’m just gonna go throw up in the cereal aisle real quick.
8. my husband has become more attentive than ever, & of course, i’m using this to my advantage. if i want a chili cheese dog from 7-11 at 10pm, i just ask & he’s out the door before i can finish the sentence. i’m falling in love with him more & more (except when i’m getting sick & blaming him because after all, he did this to me) declaimer: i’ve never yelled these words at my husband. ever. 
9. i cry at EVERYTHING!!! steer clear of the Sarah McLachlan animal cruelty commercials & anything involving interaction between a baby & their mother. & don’t even get me started on the military family homecoming videos. those made me cry before, now i pretty much end up dehydrated after watching them.
10. if you are lucky, you will still have some friends that won’t sugar coat & tell you straight. shout out my friend dana who told me: “i can tell you that it will get better, but that’s a lie. it doesn’t get better.” i appreciated that SO much more than everyone else telling me it will get better.

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BONUS:

11. two words: pregnancy brain. the struggle is real. i will stop, mid-sentence, & forget what i was even talking about. this happens to my husband on the regular, so our conversations have gotten very confusing & very short. people keep reminding me that i am sharing my entire body, including my brain, with the baby. well, this baby better end up being a genius because he is making me look like an idiot. disclaimer: yes i used the pronoun “he.” we haven’t found out the sex of the baby but it’s easier than writing he/she . . . & i am not going to refer to my child as it.

photo 5huge thanks to alex for being my very first guest spot.

& thank you for reading!

got pregnancy questions? sure! leave them & i’ll do my best to answer them. & by that, i mean ask my 19 friends who are currently with-child.

xo

10 thoughts on “guest spot alex: ten things being pregnant has taught me.

  1. Pregnancy is only making my Poppy a little more sassy and I love it! Can’t wait to babysit this little nugget 😉

  2. Sorry, Alex that I shared my pregnancy/delivery story.
    Oh, and pregnancy brain turns into mom brain. I still haven’t gotten mine back!

  3. Ha no Corinne, your story was funny!!! I don’t mind hearing from people that I know (most of the time) and at least yours made me laugh! I will certainly not wait until 7cms to ask for the epidural, that’s for sure!! 🙂

  4. well this is awesome and i certainly relate (um, 9 and 11, hello mirror!). when i have a VERY rotund belly, i think it’ll be okay for people to touch, but right now, when it’s literally just my normal sized belly, stay away!

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